Roger L'Estrange (34)

Here are some more fables from Roger L'Estrange's Fables of Aesop and Other Eminent Mythologists, and you can click here for all the L'Estrange fables at this blog.

A Council of Beasts

The Beasts (a great while ago) were so harass'd out with Perpetual feuds and Factions, that they call'd a General Council, in the nature of a Committee of Grievances, to Advise upon some way for the Adjusting of Differences, in order to a Publick Peace. After a great many Notable Things said upon the Debate, Pro and Con, the Hares at last (according to the Printed Votes of those Days) deliver'd their Sense to this Effect: There can never be any Quiet in this World, so long as one Beast shall be Allow'd Nails, Teeth, or Horns, more then Another; but the Weaker will still be a Prey to the Stronger: Wherefore we humbly propose an Universal Parity, and that we may be all upon the same Level, both for Dignity and Power; for we may then, and not till then, promise our selves a Blessed State of Agreement, when no one Creature shall be able to Hurt another.

The Mobile are still for Levelling; that is to say, for Advancing themselves, For 'tis as Broad as'tis long, whether they Rise to others, or bring others down to them. Beside, that the Doctrine of Levelling strikes at the very Order of Providence.

A Wolf and a Fox

A Wolf that had a mind to take his ease, stor’d himself privately with Provisions, and so kept close a-while. Why, how now Friend, says a Fox to him, we han’t seen you abroad at the Chase this many a Day! Why truly, says the Wolf, I have gotten an Indisposition that keeps me much at home, and I hope I shall have your Prayers for my Recovery. The Fox had a fetch in’t, and when he saw it would not fadge; away goes he presently to a Shepherd, and tells him where he might surprize a Wolf, if he had a mind to’t. The Shepherd follow’d his Directions, and destroy’d him. The Fox immediately, as his next Heir, repairs to his Cell, and takes Possession of his Stores; but he had little Joy of the Purchase, for in a very short time, the same Shepherd did as much for the Fox, as he had done before for the Wolf.

‘Tis with Sharpers as ‘tis with Pikes, they prey upon their own kind; and ‘tis a pleasant Scene enough, when Thieves fall out among themselves, to see the cutting of one Diamond with another.

illustration by Barlow

The Crows and Pigeons

There happen'd a Suit in Law betwixt the two Families of the Crows and the Pigeons; but for Quietness sake, they agreed upon an Order of Reference, and the Kite was to be Arbitrator. The Cause was Heard, and Judgment given for the Crows.

Ask my Brother if I'm a Thief. One Criminal upon the Bench, will be sure to bring off another at the Barr.

An Agreement between the Wolves and the Dogs

The Wolves found themselves in a great Straight once how to deal with the Dogs, they could do well enough with 'em one by one they saw, but were still worsted and over-born by Numbers. they took the Matter into Debate, and came at last to this conclusion, That unless they could make a Party among them, and by a Parcel of Fair Words and Pretences, engage them in a Confederacy against their Masters and Themselves, there was no good to be done in the matter. Upon this, they sent out their Spies among the Dogs, with Instructions to go to those among them that were nearest their own Make, Size and Colour, and to reason the matter with them, after this or the like manner. Why should not we that are all of a Colour, and in a manner all of a Kind, be all of a Party too, and all of an Interest? You'll say perhaps, that your Masters, and your Fellows may take it Ill, and pick a Quarrel with ye. Well, and what will they be able to maek on't then, against You and us together? If it comes to that once, 'twill be but One Push for all, and the Work is done. This Discourse wrought as well as Heart could wish; for a great many of the Wolf-Colour'd-Dogs cry'd out, Well mov'd upon't, and so went over to the other side: And what came on't at last, but that after the Dogs had Deserted, the Wolves Worry'd one Part of their Enemies by the help of the Curs that went over to them; and they were then strong enough to destroy the Revolters themselves.

A House divided against it self, cannot stand.

A Taylor and his Wife

There happen'd a Grievous Quarrel once betwixt a Taylor and his Wife. The Woman in contempt of his Trade, call'd her Husband Pricklouse; he gave her a Box o'th' Ear for't, which serv'd only to make her more outragious. When this would do no good, he set her up to the Chin in a Horse-Pond; but so long as her Tongue was at liberty, there was not a Word to be got from her, but the same Nick-Name in Derision over and over again. Well (says he to himself) there's no way, I perceive, to quiet this Woman, but by stopping of her Mouth; and so he had Duck's next bout over Head and Ears. When she was under Water, and could call him Pricklouse no longer with her Lips, she held up her Hands over her Head, and did it with her Thumbs by the Knicking of her Nails; and when he saw that once, he was e'ev glad to give her over.

The last Two Things that die in an Impetuous Woman, are her Tongue and her Stomach, when she cannot have her Will.